Perhaps this is woo woo - but maybe you need to decide that you are going to do it, and then you'll find that the door opens for you. It worked for me. I decided to bite the bullet and started to work out how I was going to get 2 weeks away from home and kids to go to Zaytuna and pay for it all - and Tom announced that he was doing his PDC over 12 weekends 45 mins up the road from me for next to nothing. And I second Deee's point to Sammyjo. My house would be a very different house had I done my PDC before I bought it. I keep reminding myself that it is a reflection of where I was in my journey 3 years ago and rather than being frustrated by it I use it as a reminder of how far I have come.