Disagreeing ideas

Discussion in 'General chat' started by debonatrek, Apr 3, 2014.

  1. debonatrek

    debonatrek Junior Member

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    I was wondering if anyone here has a property with a partner that has absolutely no interest in permaculture? that totally disagrees with any ideas that are put forward to them? that thinks its a load of hippy sh*t and wont even open their minds?

    what (legally) can i do? Its so disheartening
     
  2. eco4560

    eco4560 New Member

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    I have kids that won't step into the garden and can't tell a tomato plant from a potato plant. I just ignore it and do what I want. It's a bit harder when its your partner and they want a say in how you are spending your shared income.

    Start small with things you can do without spending money to prove that it works? Have dinner parties where you stack the table with permie friends that you know they'll get along with? Offer sexual privileges in return for planting fruit trees?

    Failing all that, they make a great compost starter, but you did say you wanted a legal solution. (Can you tell why I might still be single?)

    Is the relationship 100% worth it in every other aspect? (That's a rhetorical question - no need to spill the beans on line.)
     
  3. debonatrek

    debonatrek Junior Member

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    lol. i think i like your compost starter idea:)

    I agree i should start small and show him
     
  4. mischief

    mischief Senior Member

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    Dont bother labelling it something special. Call it common sense.
    If each idea you have will improve your property then that is exactly what it is. If its fun and turns out how you expected it too, even better.

    ....hippy shit? dont they wear long flowing dresses and smoke dope? I think I have a dress somewhere but I'm way to miserly to pay so much just for a joint. lol.
    I suggest a glass or four of your favourite red wine and query just exactly what hippy shit is just so's you know what you're not supposed to be doing.

    I'm really curious as to what it is about looking after a property so its in a more natural state and in better condition than you found it that qualifies it as old ..........
     
  5. Terra

    Terra Moderator

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    If you want this as part of your life "they" ultimately will have to accept your need to do your part .

    "They" will likely watch the footy or have a V8 car or do crosswords or paint pictures , point being "they" will have interests of their own and there is nothing wrong with your interests.

    As above start small keep the spending small get some results use your cunning what cant "they" resist

    You may not be able to but I would be pointing the finger if my SO pulled that on me
     
  6. songbird

    songbird Senior Member

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    clarity will help, as you say, ask them about what they mean by "hippy sh*t" that they would object to.

    like do they object to growing food, making compost, or is the trouble that you want to convert grass into garden space? grass may take more water and mowing to keep looking ok, but for a non-gardener grass is easy, they get out the mower and run it over and then perhaps they have some trimming around the edges and they are done. none of this unending fiddling that they might see it being when you spend all day in the gardens (and thus not attending to the normal amount of bowing and scraping or humble services or whatever they might normally be expecting). in most relationships it isn't always about how much of what they get, but when they get less due to change they dislike the trend. : )

    i live with my Ma, who owns this land, we garden and do some things in common, but she doesn't always understand what i'm up to (either permaculture wise or organic gardening wise or perhaps creating habitat for other creatures), it may take years to get a small way along the path (see my systems posts for more details), but each time i make progress she does actually see results that improve things. that is perhaps where the rubber meets the road. to do things that improve the various aspects of the partnership.

    patience, persistence, communication, talking about shared goals, trying to not make disputes into major troubles, compromises, working plans out together, talk, talk, talk...
     

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